Wednesday, September 2, 2009

Marriage Meetings

Corporations do it. Parent groups do it. Even church members do it. So when Jeff and I first heard about it at a marriage seminar, we thought, "Hey, we should be doing this, too!" So, we've been trying to do it once a week every since.

Conducting a meeting, that is.

Armed with our family calender, our personal to-do lists, and the latest stack of bills, we spend most of the meeting systematically discussing both our schedules and finances. In the past, these were two areas we frequently fought about; now that we're talking about the matters so often, though, there's no surprises, and thus, a lot less fighting.

Peppered in between those essential topics are matters of the heart. A single offense from the week for each one of us is revisited and examined, and we ask one another, did we really settle that? Is there a better way we could have handled it?

Hurts are balanced with an affirmations. Granted, complimenting one another, and remembering one incident from the week about which to give kudos, is not always as easy as finding fault. The best things in life, however, are never the easiest.

Finally, we end our meeting with a good talk about how we think our kids are doing. It's a great time to share observations we've made about them while we're not all together--sometimes a mom notices great things a dad might not see. Likewise, Jeff has an eye into my sons' lives that I can't begin to understand.

The whole thing takes at least an hour, and while it might sound laborious, it's not. During those times when we haven't had a minute to ourselves, we know a meeting's right around the corner, and whatever's on our mind will eventually be able to be discussed.

So that's how we've been spending our Sunday nights. And just in case you're wondering--yes, I take notes during the meeting. These are glorious times, reconstructing us, and I don't want to forget a single one of them.

1 comment:

  1. Great idea, Thanks! Judy Schofield married 19.5 years